When I found myself keeping track of how to stay out of the way, sight, and mind of others, I was alarmed. Being quiet as a mouse and making sure no one was looking at me, I began to worry about myself.

This leave-me-alone feeling began to scare me.
I label myself an introvert. But this behavior was more like introverts on steroids.

Does anyone make t-shirts that say “stay away from me” in bright red?
I do not know.
My brain kicked in to say, you cannot continue to live this way, which startled me because I enjoyed my cloistered existence.

Then, my mom died. Soon, her can-do attitude began to show up in my thoughts, dreams, and musings. She loved people and visiting and gatherings.

Now, the more I remember my mom and her life, the more lift I feel. Truly powerful.

World-shutting no longer shows up in my life.